i was thinking, it's only been a couple days since he left, and i was thinking we were together 11 years. s. got wickett cat in 2009 and i met jeremiah johnson when i was walking the wick and j.j. asked me for help with mister. a gift from heaven. i'm eternally grateful. i was still drinking then and we had some hard times ahead, but something magical started happening and continued happening for 11 years. i don't know when mister started having the arthritis. heartsink. but we were super active for many years, swimming every day and running. i think if only his body could have lasted longer, but he was old for a golden, and he was an arthritic hero. and i think other things would have been happening now and i'm grateful that he was clear and calm and ready to go, my honey boy. 11 years, it ends so quick.

i want to think his spirit transmigrated into me and thereby got an extension in life. i think of all the mind melds we did. i don't really know. but if love can do that then he would be twinned with me. would i miss him this much if he resided in me? maybe, considering i often feel bereft and missing myself.

anyway he was a hero in life and he's my hero and he will forever be. i could not be more happy and thrilled and proud of my little mister.