I'll try now to make a transition. It's complete now. I was sad and angry, and I got myself stuck in a negative feedback loop. Other people see this change differently. I want to transition to acceptance and make a positive feedback loop, as nature does. Nature wants sustainability, and will work with the land grab and the done deal.

Everything changes and we are changed by every change. We're almost beyond recognition, but not without precedent. The rulers who rule without rules say it's okay to build towers in the park, and endless war is okay, and genocide. Everything is okay if money is made. The little ghost people who love the rulers can be seen looking down from ominous windows at other ghost people on the ground as they might see themselves, from a great squat heavenly tower, parked in a privatized carceral paradise, unaware of their status as ghosts in life.

 We saw The Little Singer last night. It's an indigenous community school named after a little fellow who always sang. The children in the past were taken from their communities and sent to boarding schools where they were beaten and raped and often killed and buried behing the school with no grave markers. That was after the outright genocide. In the indigenous school they sang songs and learned their original language, but the world was terribly changed, their land was stolen and the mining companies poisoned the water and brought cancer to the community. It's so fucking sad how the settlers stole the land and killed the people and it keeps going on yet life continues in whatever way life can.

 it's a psychic virus. it's a cult.

 Saturdaydream. Olive woke and found a wasp flying around the bedroom. I'm listening to Heather Stebbins, On Separation. I leave Israel on the Brink and begin Small Town Girls. I have one more that squeaked through my bottlenecked queue, Hexes of the Deadwood Forest, awaiting my pick-up. I captured the wasp in a yogurt tub and released it by the fire door. Olive's in the window behind me watch all the flying things.

 I can only hope, writing in 2024, that by the time this book is published, Israel will have withdrawn from Gaza and will have ceased the large-scale ethnic cleansing and genocidal policies they are currently pursuing.

Ilan Pappé

Israel on the Brink

No, that's not happening, Israel is getting more and more genocidal, and it seems odd that Pappé would have had that hope given the Israel's policy has never changed. His book already seems like the past. The past almost happens too fast for such books to have currency, and such hopes, well, they seem hopeful. What is hope, anyway, in a genocidal world? You can't live without it I suppose, but it won't save us.

 You can't escape it, you just have to get used to it.