there's a post by the holistic psychologist today on empathy and the lack of the ability to self-soothe. the continuous anxiety i feel probably comes from that lack. i didn't learn empathy, and i didn't learn to sooth myself, and i see how these are two parts of the same whole. 

A common trait in those who struggle with empathy is an inability to self soothe. If we cannot soothe ourselves, we cannot help to soothe another.

as i read this i'm feeling anxious. when i went to the lake today i was thinking while i floated about this thing: even here, in the water, i can't soothe myself. and if i can't soothe myself no amount of floating will do. 

can i learn this? not just read it but practice and embody it? i have to.