here's what i got at the library today:      surrender by joanna pocock       kraft by jonas lüscher     anthropica by david hollander        red comet by heather clark.  i told r. i had 4 books and 2 movies waiting and she said oh boy, are you getting anxious and i said a little, but i got lots of time and there are no late fines and after the little adrenalin rush of fear of too much and too little i feel the goodness of the windfall apple is here and welcome. (also we got a windfall half bushel of late apples) almost too much is a blessing when it's a good thing particularly in a pandemic. not too much suffering if you please. but when i was self-checking out with my windfall books and movies the screen said you have one more and i looked and a cart was coming down the hall. it was anthropica, and then i did breathe a little gust of apprehension, after seeing red comet:the short life and blazing art of sylvia plath is 937 pages. but it's ok, in fact i'm less afraid than at the beginning of the pandemic, even though it's far worse now and the government is more invested in war and the police state than preserving our lives, and i realize after the sick fuck trump, again as with raygun say or baby bush, anything can happen and it will so just be as best you can for tomorrow we all die, or the next day, whether we have books in our queue or overdue.