i went to the healer, and she is a healer, not a miracle worker, shaman kind, she's practical, pragmatic, we'll try this and see, we'll try something else if this doesn't work, and see. admittedly i think my childish heart wants a miracle worker, even as my head turns skeptical. i'm glad she didn't have to play to my inchoate expectations and just did her thing. i have to have faith. the first thing we try is lomatium dissectum, or fernleaf biscuitroot, a plant used by indigenous tribes. let's see if it works. i like that it's a native plant, a native cure, down to earth. i'm still scared though, moody, still feel exhausted and under occupation by this fungus.