lost feelings regard feeling lost. can being lost be a given with joy and wonder part of the flow? isn't everything? feeling stultified is like the end of flow. maybe the mind exaggerates, feeling encroached upon. maybe it's just that the flow is sluggish. that's what i feel. a cold-sapped tree waiting for spring and the mind in anticipation is like that, cold sap. and it isn't even cold yet. first i need to find the solstice, and then it will drop to where my forehead will gasp and stiffen. i have to use my sluggish mind for now. it makes me sad. i feel like i need much more than i have to get something done. knowing nothing is ever done, yet somehow flows with regards.
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