i was so long just with the dogs, my heart, just carried by the dogs, and thinking with the sigh of such things, it is just enough. and now i am with r. i think i can say. and now she's not here. and i think i feel fear, that is part of the old fear and part of the new, the ever renewing, fear of the world. like i might be falling back and away, or in my old dream, i might be falling in place. and in my mind today i see me falling silently with dogs in space.