i sometimes feel i could sink into the earth, and sometimes fly apart. i picked a rune stone for my birthday solstice. wrong. i didn't mention it first. i thought we would share it after i picked it. now we are apart. it got quite cold last night. the windows vibrated, i woke up to pee and had a ringing in my right ear. you can feel the wind in the apartment this morning. the rune stone i picked by chance is unknowable. something is really really wrong. it's xmas eve day. the sky turned white a minute ago and then the sun lit the buildings. something is really wrong. blank is the end, blank the beginning. the book of runes says this is the rune of total trust, immediate contact with your own true destiny, which rises from the ashes of what we call fate, again and again. it may portend death, usually symbolic. here the unknowable informs you that it is in motion in your life. in that blankness is held undiluted potential. drawing the blank rune may bring to the surface our deepest fears: will i fail? will i be abandoned? will it all be taken away? and yet our highest good, our truest possibilities and all our fertile dreams are held within that willingness and permitting are what this rune requires for how can you exercise control over what is not yet in form? the blank rune calls for no less an act of courage than an empty-handed leap into the void. the unknowable represents the path of karma—the sum total of your actions and their consequences, the lessons that are yours for this lifetime. and yet this rune teaches that the very debts of old karma shift and evolve as you shift and evolve. nothing is predestined: what beckons is the creative power of the unknown. whenever you draw the blank rune, take heart: know that the work of self-change is progressing in your life.
today i feel ill in spirit and estranged.
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