mister hobbled by a sausage and latkes some chucklehead tossed by the sidewalk. i sighed with relief but i couldn't tell what it was until we came around again and i saw bonnie eating the thing. i used to eat those things, eating them looks obscene, i realized wow i ate a lot of obscene things, especially when drinking.
i had a good talk therapy, about affluence, abuse, and integration more or less those and listening to instinctive voices and noting environmental triggers. also that we don't need to remember dreams consciously because our unconscious won't let us forget. stuff about dad, triggered by edward st. aubyn. i forget a lot but i remember a few things and some are dreams and some are memories. the unconscious knows the differences are all one thing. i'm working on integration. after a life of separation.
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