for some reason i thought of bear, living in north carolina now. i doubt ben will make contact again. i can't even recall his last name at the moment, but there's enough happening right here. i hope bear has a good life. maybe i dreamt her last night. it feels like the next to last somehow and it feels like contiguity. we are here, the dogs say by standing, here in the broken whole. i still only have one dog lulu but i can imagine another dog waiting for me.