i rode my blue bike in the clear blue cold to drop the last envelope of rent on the studio. r. asked if it was sad and i said not so sad, sad in the way of change, and in the way of the world sadness which by now i know is not just my personal inscape. the studio was a blessing for me and for carrie too. it needed to be a good space for someone like me to gather my thoughts and things for about fifteen years. it felt happy/sad to hand deliver the last envelope for the precious space that enveloped me through the years. and now i have the treehouse in the book corner of the blue bedroom, and renate and penny to envelop me.