we just saw the video of the police murdering a terrified, fleeing 13 year old who committed no crime. he stopped and put his hands up. they hunted him and shot him dead. i don't know if we should watch these murders. the videos don't stop the police from murdering. they're predators, trained, licensed, and paid   to kill. 

 one time my sister was chased down the alley by an unmarked vehicle on the way to my house and ran in terror up my back stairs where i was sitting on the porch. they said nothing to identify themselves as police, and my reaction was absolute fear but also protection. i held out my hand to to the chest of the first to stop the assault and he threatened me. if i had dark skin i may have been blasted to death that night. that's what my body remembers when i see police terrorize people now. i will never forget that night. i just realized writing this that though i don't live in daily terror like so many it's just because i'm in the arbitrary category of white, but i know the terror of that night, and i feel the hulking shadow of it every time i see the police.