i'm not enthralled with in memory of memory. it's more discursive and not as poetically compelling as i imagined. but it's more that it's a lot to take in, the memory of memory, and it's other peoples' memory or memory of memory and it's like a sea of memory and yet you can't simply float in it you have to tread water—and read. and that's the thing, it does have poetry but it's work. and i might rather be  washed over with images than memories. even my own, which i mostly don't actively remember. they're like water. now i'm writing too much, but not a thick book of humdreds of pages of words. let's have brevity. it may be you waited a long time to say something and then you want to say everything. you can't. ever. it's better not to imagine a book but just read it i know but i got a certain feeling with the writer and translator talking than i get from the book. but there's a lot of grist for the mill in it. somebody's mill. 

i got the new ishiguro and antonio. and ring shout. 361 people are waiting in the queue for ishiguro so i hope it's good. 

the ducks are eating fish from the thawing ice and the turtles are back. other fish either thawed back to life or lived at the bottom under the ice. i think they put the turtles inside til spring, unless they burrow in the mud and hibernate. lulu stepped onto the ice and her feet went through and then the ice started to sink and she jumped out. i'm going to wear shorts tomorrow unless it changes back. 

we went to the studio and the ceiling was dry! and my plastic window held through the late winter. we want to caretake and curate the place and clear the clutter and make it all nice. it smelled again of sewer gas so i did a sage smudge. i think it's not a place i'd like to live again but it might be good to keep anyway unless i'm broke and have no dogs to sustain me. i'll never find a place for such a good price again in obombaland.

ok kids, i'm done procrastinating in memory of memory now. i hope to be seeing you tomorrow or down the road.

everything deserves to be remembered but it doesn't need to be, it still exists and continues without our memory.

love from lulu of the heartland.