precious boy. i always knew it even when he was a troubled youngster, but the surgery made it oh so clear.

i just watched To Have and To Be, by Nicolas Philibert. so beautiful i can't describe, smart and gentle and loving, ensouled. it's about a teacher that  seems remarkable to me having grown up in the american school system, small classes and mixed ages and older kids helping younger and the teacher gently guiding. it's more about having than being here but i don't care for that, i only care for being. maybe because i don't have much.