ok i don't understand the changes going on. i'm trying to keep a record. of what i don't understand. i arrange the floor so you don't fall and can more easily rise. what else? i listen to your breathing. what does it mean. labor of living. drawing close. drawing breath. the air thick in the veins, the age of lungs. you smack your lips. shall i bring you a drink? a water bottle? a squirt? i recall giving old rose pieces of ice. i have no ice. i'll get some ice. he didn't look in the closet for the cat jasper, didn't roam and investigate and find the penny cat toys.
makes me sad everything. i have to be here with the change i don't understand. i know he's changed so have i. i don't know how it happened so fast. can you swallow, can you breathe, can you tell me what you need? and so on.