the doc at royal treatment says you have to tell fen it's ok to go, that you'll be ok, so he won't hold on and suffer, but i say we have to grieve now and grieve together, while we celebrate the days we have, i say he will know we are not ok, that we are grief-stricken, that we will cling to him every moment and we will miss him terribly when he goes. and that is how we grieve and celebrate. he knows how we feel anyway, day by day.