the alarm went off, then on again. i know i'll be listening for it now like a jingle that finally leaves but leaves you feeling it'll be back again. i know it will so it's ok. whatever we know is ok. and whatever eludes our limited understanding is ok too. penny is heading that way. since jaspy died i've finally got close to her and i'll be sad again, but i'm glad animals don't think about death or they just accept the fact, and they continue studying life until the end. it's we who dwell on death, yet hide a lot, and have such a strange relation to life.