a light bulb in the whitewashed no graffiti spider web tunnel 

 and oliver!

it dawned on me, or it afternooned on me that when you're gone people don't even know 
and that's being ordinary or ordinary being life and it's ok it's like you're in the stream you're just not visible sometimes and it's assumed you're still there and maybe your presence is felt due to your having been around so long, so i didn't say to anyone i'm back.