i been removed twice as caretaker because i'm non-compost-mentis.

 the first time was for my nieces, a relief i'm sure. i'd be a bad dad. my dad was a bad dad too, and i'm not one for such traditions. and my last real dog i left in canada. and i'm still wrecked with gilt.

it's just that i know inchoately we should always be together. but for a while i thought that about xstine, and about bigsby too. but people don't always do the right thing even by their loved ones, and as that one dude said sometimes love is not enuf.

anyway nobody but me said about that non-compost-mentis thing and if it is so it is often mutually assured.

still i'm glad for what we had like the song goes and i'm glad for what we have like the day goes.

and nothing is certain except for perhaps mutually assured destruction. but not me and copp. i love him to my last breath.

i don't know what'd happen to either of us if he was taken away. i hope he would adapt, he's a genius of adaptation, but sure it'd never be the same.