i thought about it. charlie leaving is the end of something. something else will happen, but not this. the light she brings to people's eyes. the joy. i have to feel this. this time is full of loss, and some can't understand how i can let her go. i used to say when i was frustrated with something i couldn't change, she's not my dog. she's her own dog, as r. says. there's more going on here than i can explain. i may understand more in time. now i have to trust, and let go. if my friend wasn't getting her i'd feel more bereft, but i know she will be happy.