so they say if you think you are going insane then you're not insane, like the insane don't know they are, but if you are losing your memory you know it, and if you are losing your memory you're losing your mind, whether or not you're going insane. and i think we definitely can observe ourselves going insane, even if the observer is unable to keep from going. my memory is full of loss, and i feel i'm losing my mind. there's no cultural well of sanity to draw from, so we're on our own. i think more people are going insane and losing memory because of the amnesia and insanity of this culture, and some are killing, and some committing suicide. i won't do either of those. i'm not that kind of insane. i'm the kind that wants to be a better person and preserve memory, and not to die lost and confused.