the past two days have been wondrous weather and i've felt a kind of disembodied beauty though my back hurts bringing me back to the earth, bent. now the wonder is layered under a sleepless night of wind and gunfire and my back fused like a nervous boardwalk. and i don't look so happy from under water. it's a lonely life. if you solve the big things like in your head, your traumatic childhood and stuff, the little things, the things of life in a violent city in a violent country with a government of continual war, well those things become manageable i'm told and you are freed to enjoy the warming globe. still it was a wondrous day.