o, bleak. i can't imagine why anyone, let alone i and i, would live in such a vortex of bleak as chicago. the bleak is impacting my brain such that i can't think. the constant danger is making me dull and nutty. if it were not for copp i would lapse beyond this blighted place, i would sink further and further into desuetude. i would watch Safe endlessly. but copp this morning was so friskey and ran up in the park and nudged my hand and grinned so with shining black eyes and i knew i again i have a heart companion in this and he even loves it, so i got my mojo back, a little. finishing Gang Leader for A Day. talk about bleak.

transmutation, beauty from death

visit from summer sumac and long trees that are no longer

beyond heros

birthday helium balloon

brief transient

copp and crow.

pier diamond

emptiness, the spirit behind everything

god of the lake

history as apocalypse

i could have been a tree, what if i were a tree, would i be stuck then, what if i were grafted with a tree, what then.

it feels so goooood.

it feels sooooooo good.

longing for vanishing ones.

mimetic. no, i don't know what it means. i may have once but i can't be bothered now. but words just crop up. because i can't think and words just crop up, like stones in a fallow field, and what use is knowledge, i mean i love knowledge, but what should we know.

a visit from mister in summer. i dont know what brings these pictures back to mu memory card. i delete every day, and they come back from the warm season. is there a god in the machine?

earth and heaven, reaching piers, nothing, grey, expansive, in between.

a film about twins, red without blue, one gay, one transgender, who try to double suicide and survive in san francisco.

jasper lala suz

red graffito

reminiscence alley

first came babies then came separation then came divorce then it went round in circles

snail

socially constructed ideas are dispensable.

something lost in transformation.

thanks again mister

shadow thief

there's no x in escape i say to the character on the screen, there's no escape i tell myself. there is this ex-scape, this like zone that's unspeakable we inhabit.

ok tighten up now, we're almost done.

tilty and silt.

time capsule.

twin pools.

twins' pool.

visit from before become now.

we were relatively happy and innocent relatively.

you can go back and forth.