i feel strange in my brain, a chasm in a snow globe shook by a giant, cars skidding and shuddering, can't see the lanes. the sound of wheels is muffled, and the siren passing through the white wind. this is the thing, i feel strange in my brain.

 there's a good storm going on. i went up to see the view from the 17th floor. r.'s cooking lentils and roasting cauliflower and sweet potatoes. i'm acting like a lord of leisure. we're going to watch possessor, a science fiction horror film by cronenberg, son of cronenberg. we need a good horror story as homeopathic vaccine for the horror show of america. updat. don't bother with possessor it's just more gore.

 i always got by somehow. i think some elementals were looking out for me. still i was precarious in clandestiny. i got a license at 16 and a fat red ford fairlane. i think it would be a great casket but it couldn't wait. i sold my last car in 84. i'm grateful to get rides to the library and to see the cranes. i'm thankful more often than i say. can't i just be thankful all the time? i drove enough. i got here, didn't i? if possible i just wanna ride.

 i thought a library card was enough. it's not easy to live off the grid in the city. it's not easy to live like a kid. i gotta admit i'm getting too old for it. it's not a shame to be proud of it, but it is what it is. i grew scrawny and radical on the gruel of the abzurd. at least i never had fancy ideas about gettin rich. a lot of things in this poor country don't make sense. i hate the state that makes hate great.

 the complementary word of the day is infinitesimally—let's not forget where we live—let us prey—home of the armed, the free and the void—and incrementality.

 in this country you can get pardoned for murder or murdered for nothing. it's the land of opportunity.

 hawaii's beaches are disappearing because rich people like obama build mansions and sea walls. the beaches belong to the people who are displaced by the rich people who buy the land and disappear the beaches and the people who are not rich like obama. 

meanwhile the rich and powerful obama fundation intends to take over jackson park and make it a private enterprise. and there's nothing we can do really, except keep a record of what the rich and powerful take from us.

it's still the same old story of paradise lost.