beware the fake drowner

i saw a person's belongings on the beach and no person. then a kind of puffy white fellow came up and asked if it was my stuff. he said a guy went swimming to the shipwreck and disappeared. he said another guy swam out there and got a $150 buck ticket for violating a protected area. he put on his mask and snorkel to go find the guy, but then he just kind of blubbered around manatee-like. i walked toward another guy who may have seen the first guy and then the manatee yelled to me help! quite casually, dipping under, then rolling on his back and spluttering. i said, dude, you can almost stand there, come on, swim, and he said help! i said, dude, i got a bad back, i can't help you, and walked back, glancing over at him. when i got back to mister dude was already ashore. now i've seen crazy, and right there too, i remember the schitzo-nazi dog hater threatened to kill me and my dog. but this is a new crazy to me. i bet there's a syndrome identified with fake drowners. i should have got a picture for this blog, but i'm sure you'll recognize him. he has a pale round shape like a manatee with salt and pepper hair and kind of fish eyes.