It would be depressing news indeed to learn that, should a civilization collapse, there might nevertheless be decent ways to go forward—but the best people of the civilization would be the least equipped to find them.

Jonathan Lear

 It's a mystery i tell Trudy, though that doesn't help. It's just something to say. And it's true, everything we cannot understand. I hear Olive in the other room, doing something. I need to think. What does thinking do? Trudy thinks Why can't I remember stuff? It's not just something to say it is a mystery. All of it. It's kind of cruel seeming, the mind in a loop, remembering how it can't remember stuff anymore, the mind become an old nag, like an old trail horse that wants to stop working finally and eat crackers in the stall under the hay loft. Memory can be a trap in the present.

 Memory is a way of life. Lost memory. Always feeling there is another life, unremembered, not lived. If you forget things it's not like having no memory, you can forget and still have memory. Even having lost memory you still remember some things but you can't make memory from things now. Regarding the lost way of life of the Crow people. Nothing happens, and it keeps on happening. Nothing has meaning. The context has irrevocably changed.

 Shame is one of the basic emotionsby which we regulate our sense of what is and what is not appropriate behavior. It originates in very early experiences of being exposed. 

- Jonathan Lear

I thought of daydreaming in class i was naked in under my desk - or dreaming same at night and thinking that way all the next day and the following days hiding my nakedness while exposed and also a ghost ignored. 

angels i need to talk to you every day but you need me too, angels. you need me too.

-jonathan richman



 

This is the age when we have to confront evil, in ourselves, and organized evil in the world. 

 Pardon me, but can you please tell me what that squat monster tower is doing in the park? Is it for real?

we're supposed to develop our intellect now. 

 

 We walked over to see Trudy today. She said, I'll get up. She said I can't remember anything. You remember some things I say. We brought her cherries. She remembered picking cherries in Michigan. We got her some minestrone soup, two soups for three bones. She ate one and saved one for later. She said you won't leave us? I said no I won't leave. R. said you remember me, and Doug. I said I'm glad you remember me. She read my shirt, Support Local Bees. She said great grandfather was a beekeeper. She didn't want to listen to music, she didn't want to sing, but she like her soup.

 Pray for Palestine. Death, death, death to the IOF.

 Long live the resistance. Everything that goes around comes around. Dogs will generally forgive you, if you ask, but genocide is unforgivable. The whole world is Palestine, if we believe in freedom. 

 no lulu today. she had to have a lump removed. pray for lulu, pray for gaza. only wear matching high heeled shoes, if you have to. 

 The two top mass murderers meet in the White House. One mass murderer says to the other, We've never had such a good friend in the White House. The two top mass murderers seem to be in a kind of death-dealing love. 

send it to me.

 

 It is indubitably obvious to even the most casual of observers the regime cares only for the power elite. 

-Mr. Reinhart

 

It’s just for capital. Am I an animal? And do I care at all? Capital, capital. I’m just an animal.

-Amyl and the Sniffers

 We're suspended in grief. I'm reading Radical Hope, ethics in the face of cultural devastation, by Jonathan Lear, about the Crow people. Chief Plenty Coups says after their way of life was cut off and they were put on reservations, nothing happened. It feels like that, like we're living that legacy, cut off by our own culture of domination and land theft and genocide.

I wrote that in a comment on Diana Van Eyk's post about grief and numbness.

I keep thinking, What is our way of life, or What was our way of life?

 Our focus must remain on Gaza. Today, we are all the resistance. 

-Seyed Mohammad Marandi

 olive palestine. the smartest cat on earth.

 

we went to the graveyard to visit our little old friend the mulberry tree. i filled my vessel and r. gave me back her vessel, empty. she likes to eat right from the tree. after mulberrying the clouds came with a cool wind and we saw a ghost but it was just a man in a white suit. 

 Olive asks Are you okay? Junebug sends this in reply.

 We tortured some folks.

-Barack Hussein Obama

 the normalization of genocide is the most terrifying achievement of the empire.

 At least eight hundred and fifty starving Palestinians have been murdered in Gaza Humanitarian Foundation aid massacres. An IDF soldier set himself on fire. The U.S. Israeli Zionist regime is criminally insane.

 How are you feeling? Are you okay? 

 for the first time in human history, for nearly two years, the world has watched as the war machine commits a daily holocaust. no one believes the narrative of democracy anymore.

 

they want to destroy iran in order to destroy the resistance to the u.s. zionist regime. they have the death technology, but they can't kill the resistance, even if they destroy earth. earth resists. anyway the world view of the regime is shattering even as we are arrested in our silence or in our stunned exhausted speech.

 most people oppose genocide while their governments support genocide, meaning they don't support the people. this is the way the world is today. they privatize public parks, they murder the people of gaza with an evil plan to seize and privatize the graveyard ruins. when the whole system of violent control collapses everyone will know all of these things that beset us are connected.  

 There was little singing anywhere. 

Plenty Coups

What is our way of life? Building castles for oligarchs with special needs playgrounds on land stolen from the people abandoned unrepresented while we bomb children in Palestine. I read about the Crow people. Chief Plenty Coups said "But when the buffalo went away the hearts of my people fell to the ground, and they could not lift them up again. After this nothing happened". 

We live in the After.

 mass murderer netanyahu is coming to washington again, to reap more blood money and weapons of mass destruction to continue the slaughter in gaza and beyond. monsters like these probably feel no shame. their souls are dead. this is the world we have to live with and try to be human in.

 i'm near the end of the book of shame. people have died from shame. i bet shame is quite common in this country. people probably do all kinds of things due to the shame they carry, from childhood on. it may shape entire lives. i've felt it my whole life. it's so deep rooted i can't imagine being liberated from it. it's in my blood and sinews. as with evil in the genocidal world outside i have to live with the shame inside