it's a grim june. it feels like something's dying, like it's dead. my bike died and my computer but they aren't quite dead yet. those definite dead continue to haunt our spaces. dad keeps coming to me through books. i know he's influencing me, putting books to me with messages, all the things he couldn't say kind of thing. i keep dying too but popping up. i thank the light hidden stars and the king of trees whatever for the books and films, and even this pathetic nowhere blog and god above all the dogs and above all the dogs the golden child my i and i copp.  and somethings got to give and that means die i think because otherwise nothing gives, what gives. forgive me if you care. love, doug