you talk about the yin and the yang of it all, well i do, today i went to the sale at the murder-suicide house and then frolicked with golden buddhas in the inland sea. i felt a little ambivalent about the sale but i  am ambivalent anyway and it didnt feel like a murder suicide house which was surprising and gratifying and anyway i live in a space vacated by suicide and i bring a little life to it i like to think. so i cleaned my gleaned treasures and saged the place and started reading julia kristeva's old man and the wolves. which is about dark matter in the psychology and in the human species and about human-animal transformation. so i think it was good that i went and i think i'm learning more than i can articulate at the moment and i'm going back today to see if that glowing crystal cube awaits me.