i may be on hiatus due to the death of my camera. i'm trying to find the way and feeling lost. i want to evaluate but i don't know how without stopping. it's like if you can't stop working and your body gets sick to make you stop. my mind stops, and now my camera stops, and i keep thinking i just need to pause, but maybe i need to admit, i am stopped. i can't go on this way. i dream of merging with nature, and lament that there seems to be no nature to humans. as you can tell, i am befuddled, and i amy post a few leftover things and then make myself rest.