i met a guy today who said suggested maybe i should go to gaza because i support the palestinians and not the genociders. i blocked the guy and the next time i saw him he looked past me but today he greeted me and shook my hand. we won't talk about it, but i wonder what he thinks now, almost 2 years later, after gaza has been destroyed.
Monday, June 30, 2025
i met a guy today who said suggested maybe i should go to gaza because i support the palestinians and not the genociders. i blocked the guy and the next time i saw him he looked past me but today he greeted me and shook my hand. we won't talk about it, but i wonder what he thinks now, almost 2 years later, after gaza has been destroyed.
i'm reading the changeling by kenzaburo oe. i'm thinking i've been lucky with the little free libraries lately. and i'm the lucky librarian of vista homes. i think i would be quite sad if i never read books. i may never express the feeling books have imbued in me, but i know i'm lucky. i used to have a couch kenzaburo oe slept on. i don't know what i am otherwise but i am a reader, and a watcher.
zionazi squid game. |
Deliberately starving a civilian population and then setting up aid sites as a death trap to massacre starving people trying to get food is too evil to wrap your mind around. If we saw a supervillain doing this in a movie we’d think it was dumb, because it wouldn’t be believable.
Caitlin Johnstone
hannah a. studied evil. they said she blamed the jews for the genocide but she was writing about the way the whole world conspired, mostly in silence, making deals. she fled the nazis and migrated here and then she wrote the origins of totalitarianism, studying evil in america. she didn't write about the nakba, but she surely knew, never again was a dream that was useful for the evil entity.
rough night sleep. slept too late. olive didn't wake me. i dreamt i lost lulu in a median park. i stopped to greet a dog and she went ahead to another dog and when i got there she was gone. the group she was with was suddenly farther away across a wide curved road. i wondered why i had seen them so close before. i asked a guy and he said look under the buildings of this complex and we looked but i only saw a couple large critters, one who stared back blankly, then i woke up and put olive on my chest and found a little calm and considered well it's not a prophecy, lulu's coming home in the morning and we'll walk tomorrow like we have all these years, and i tear up thinking she's my only dog now, i have to appreciate and take care and love her every day.
Sunday, June 29, 2025
the world is fed up with the siege of the u.s. and israel. people are tired of the politics of genocide. people boycott brand genocide. gaza and palestine have exposed the lies of empire. it's a cult of death and destruction. the zionist colonial terror regime is weak, collapsing. people everywhere are waking up as the insane genocidal hegemon destroys itself. that's why the music lovers chant death to the genocidal regime. song of the day, death to the iof.
so i'm reading four men shaking by lawrence shainberg. he visits a guy who lost his memory to study amnesia. he asks how he's doing and the guy always says, i'm having problems with my memory. one day he says, why not forget? you spend so much time trying to remember things—why not try to forget them? after all, you've got amnesia. you should be able to do that easily. the guy stares at him in disbelief and then laughs a loud angry stage laugh, and lawrence runs away aghast and maybe never comes back. so i'm thinking the amnesia is like lawrence's meditation. to go on with the mind, you need to keep coming back. amnesia is like the present. not time. present. to say why not just forget, they can't forget they can't remember. they have to remember the present. the mind is still being present, moment to moment. tomorrow is a concept, and a song.
Saturday, June 28, 2025
The sun'll come out tomorrow
Bet your bottom dollar, that tomorrow there'll be sun
Just thinking about tomorrow
Clears away the cobwebs, and the sorrow 'til there's none
Bet your bottom dollar, that tomorrow there'll be sun
Just thinking about tomorrow
Clears away the cobwebs, and the sorrow 'til there's none
When I'm stuck with a day that's gray and lonely
I just stick out my chin, and grin, and say, oh
I just stick out my chin, and grin, and say, oh
The sun'll come out tomorrow
Oh, you gotta hang on 'til tomorrow, come what may
Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love you, tomorrow
You're always a day away
Oh, you gotta hang on 'til tomorrow, come what may
Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love you, tomorrow
You're always a day away
The sun'll come out tomorrow
Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow there'll be sun
Just thinking about tomorrow
Clears away the cobwebs and the sorrow 'til there's none
Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow there'll be sun
Just thinking about tomorrow
Clears away the cobwebs and the sorrow 'til there's none
When I'm stuck with a day that's gray and lonely
I just stick out my chin, and grin, and say
I just stick out my chin, and grin, and say
The sun'll come out tomorrow
Oh, you gotta hang on 'til tomorrow, come what may
Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love you, tomorrow
You're always a day away
Oh, you gotta hang on 'til tomorrow, come what may
Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love you, tomorrow
You're always a day away
Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love you, tomorrow
You're always a day away
You're always a day away
trudy ate a bite of banana but wouldn't sit up. asked r. where are you? said she'd get up, then rolled over, rolled over again and sang tomorrow, tomorrow, out of the blue, drifted back to sleep, and we split. on the way home the oligarch's tower seemed unreal, while trudy felt very real. that's how we'll evaluate things for now, by how real or unreal they feel. much of what is posited as real seems very unreal, and we are grateful for real things that feel real, even sad things. i'm glad she sang the song tomorrow.
we always think of turning points and usually it's just another turn of the widening gyre or downward spiral or sucking vortex, but if the war machine manages to destroy iran it will surely try to destroy china and humanity will ultimately be dominated by the total spectrum terror state. yes, gaza may be lost, but genocide is the red line for all of us, so say it like a prayer: save gaza. pray the end of the war on earth. save life.
Colonial modernity created permanent political identities—“native” and “settler,” “minority” and “majority”—through legal fictions and administrative divisions. These identities were designed to control populations and prevent unified resistance. The colonized were not just dominated physically but restructured epistemically—taught to see themselves through the lens of the colonizer's logic.
Daniel Pinchbeck
Friday, June 27, 2025
i'm reading life review at the gate of death. people say they remember every thought and feeling of their life, even things long forgotten. they say they see everything without judgement, and they take only knowledge and love on to the afterlife. i listened to rose as she lay dying talking about a banquet. she said she didn't believe in god but she read her daily reminder every day, crossing out the word. she asked if we wanted her suitcase, as she wouldn't need to pack anything. it did feel like she was departing on a soul journey, even if she didn't believe. the soul doesn't need belief, or a suitcase, the soul just knows. i think of trudy with the lost memories. maybe in the end she'll remember everything she forgot.
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