do i need to read cruel optimism? i keep seeing references to it since lauren berlant, who lived in our building, died. i think i get it by osmosis as they say, like the communist manifesto or the bible, it's in the air, and the time ghost. i want to glean the seminal things. i get tired, especially as the days grow short. cruel optimism is what keeps people in thrall to something they can't have. or don't need, that may be toxic. it's a life impasse. maybe earth's in a cruel optimism impasse.