barney tillrock comes a'maundering.

oh the shoes she left 

doosie.

aaiiil, and yeedoggies, as weezie and kenny respectively used to utter.  when i was asked to see doozie i thought of granny weezie, but now i realize doosie is a dog of a different dimension. weezie was not a wheezer, but doosie IS a doosie.

cloud diary, last friday

barney in thistle etc.

barney ate a large salad in the limestone block enclosure and then did not poop. i hope that he does not disgorge a salad for ray.  after we went to george lucusses wedding but we were early and i said barney let's just not and say we did, afterall i genuinely prefer to be out here with you than in there with a squat star warrior and a little prince. i ain't lyin.

when i hurt you you don't have to stay hurt, she said. that is my business, i said. ok when i hurt you you will stay hurt. she said.

specific nakedness is feeling naked under your clothes, or sometimes under your desk. general nakedness is when you feel naked through your clothes, like all the time.  

i will say no more to russia as since i began courting them they have dropped away precipitously in number. perhaps i was too coy, perhaps they are shy or abhor my quasi poems and brittle rickety rhetoric. i really don't know but i shall miss anyone who come along and evacuates.

nothing is harder than otherness. nothing is easier than reasoning hatred. 

fun buttons

i think you'll find, it's in ya mind.

you know now it wasn't about the survival of the fittest right, you know it was slaughter?

so gradual you can hardly see it

but once you do you can't see nothing else

then you gradually begin to accept everything that is even though there may not be time and it's still going on

it may be some kind of experiment. i don't think it's ours.

are you there now? it mustn't be too late,

simply because you are dead, ah,, that is what i thought,,

you are communicating through nature,,  god,, you are brilliant!

for morton feldman. i really wanted to see you smile. with your whole body, like a big round smoking dog with thick black glasses and eyebrows, laughing in every picture with your whole body, like a wonderful musical dog, you laughed music.

     p.s. dad, i am really afraid. i don't know if i ever told you that.

suddenly everything was lit up and the lights went out, out of nowhere an instrumental "theme" began playing no one had any lines to say they moved slowly if at all

it's not a game anymore it was never a game we're still playing life like it was a game.

i think you almost feel it now, you're almost reaching out

the light when it comes will be almost too much too bear

under dad's tree.

dad, it's almost independence day, ha! what a joke it seems. the incendiaries and weddings carry nation. it's cool though, and we hope for some grand storms to drown the foolery. but listen, though i always talk about myself and my small earthly concerns and distractions, i think of you.

readership is sinking.

you might of told me we were just passing clouds but i don't remember who you are.

Hope, right, dies very very Hard, or does it just Go to Sleep until it is time to proper Awake?

Or Hope is just Living in the Absence of bombs or despite or to spite Them Falling.

Or under Tyranny, just to live is Liberty, and Gratitude to Tyrants.

for allowing us to live unnoticed for ignoring our lives for not using us for killing sport thankfulness for our very unworthiness in the hunt.

i wasn't called. i listened.

are dreams real. dreams are made of light.

palms to the sky.

let us shed tears into the searing american oblivion

for there's nothing to forgive death everything forgot.

i could tell in your sleep that you would leave though i didn't know it,

for i was to afread of tomorrow.

when i was a child i spake not as a child i don't recall speaking at all.

what freedoms are alienable

at the frontiers of civilization.

it began the way we both said, but it ended neither.

and that ha has made all the difference.

she left as quick as she came.

now i'm flying buttressed. 

we all share the waterworks. cabbage heads and kings. in that sense it is a democracy. but we mainly stay inside to use it in private.

the geography of a face.

that particular loving though acute was largely dissipated nearly exhausted a long time while we strove to apprehend it.

and well you know i'm almost embarrassed to say how that story ends. how it does, how does it end.