this is the picture i intended to put here but now i remember the other one had a provisional title so i might go back and put it right even if it doesn't now correspond with the text. the same on top and bottom for no reason i can think of. meeting with grant in utah was fine and i wasn't as brain fogged as i might have thought. i'm going to be part of some kind of men's group but not like that one before that creeped me out in a windowless room in the post-industrial corridor pressurized with earnest fellows and expectation of forthcoming in the proscribed way with tears and hugs and drumming. now is different than then in many ways.